Beating The Monday Blues

Since it's a Monday and nobody really likes the idea of working on a Monday, Digital Curls, Ms Troublesome, Cooking Girl and I decided to do some shopping over lunch. It was during this shopping spree that I realised I have friends who are not very helpful in my attempts to save.

While on another shopping spree last week, I had specifically told them that if we were to go on another spree this week, they were not to let me purchase anything. For the simple reason that I am no longer officially on the company's payroll. As such, my pay this month will come in late. So until I am shown the money, I am not to spend it.

It was all in vain.

After lunch, I ended up with another 3 pieces of clothing. Last week, it was 4 pieces of clothing, $20 worth of hair clips and a pair of shoes. And not forgetting the facial protectors I had invested in. I daren't think of the hole I've burnt in a span of 2 weeks.

After all the shopping today, Cooking Girl found one side of her shoe in this state...

I suggested that she do the Mentos stint they show in TV commercials. She decided instead, to drop by the Shoe Elf across the office to get it fixed. But alas, the repair was beyond the Shoe Elf. So we headed to U.R.S., didn't find anything suitable, and proceeded to Charles and Keith.

"If cannot find anything at Charles & Keith, there's always VNC. If not, there's Suntec." quipped Digital Curls.

We managed to shortlist a few pairs for Cooking Girl at Charles & Keith.

"The patent ones are nice!"

"This one makes your feet look really slim."

"You have such nice, fair legs. You should get this pair."

All these comments came from just one person, whom I feel must be the greatest culprit in thwarting my saving plans. Digital Curls. Most of my shopping was done with her.

Today, as Digital Curls and I were heading to the station to catch the train home, we decided to pop into Robinsons to check out the shoes.

Look what I came home with.

Ok babes, we've decided what's for lunch tomorrow. So remember to wear something that allows for easy trying of clothes ya? ;p

Growing Mushrooms

The supervisor's tactics and actions of time-buying, delaying, shirking of responsibilities and non-ownership of tasks results in the following in the employee:

Feelings: Frustration. Exasperation. Annoyance.

Virtue Learnt: The art of waiting. Patience.

Possible Physical Result: We wait. And then we produce mushrooms.

Seriously.

Because nothing is ever done on time. The buck is passed from one person to another, with no one claiming responsibility or doing anything about it. So we are kept waiting and waiting and waiting. Most times in vain.

The fungi see the opportunity and attack.

This afternoon, as we walked past a patch of garden area located just outside our department, we realised that even that garden patch had sprouted some mushrooms.

I wonder what they were waiting for.

Deliverance.

Finally.

Deliverance.

Liberation.

Salvation.

Call it whatever you like.

It simply means: Purples got herself out of the shit hole!

Yeah!

Congratulations....and

Celebrations.......

When I tell everyone I got out of this shit...... :))))

Unplugged

Purple's phone rings.

Ms Irrinoying: Eh, Purples, can you give me ALL the advertisers for ALL the sites for this particular period?

Purples: You need to have an idea what kind of site you want. I have a lot of spaces available.

Ms Irrinoying: You give me all can? Cos client asked for it.

Client ask you to eat shit, you eat or not?? Unreasonable. Stupid.

Purples: Clients' buys are confidential. I can't reveal their campaign details, but I can tell you what's available.

Ms Irrinoying: Ok, can. can give me all that's available so I can give options to the client. Can send within the next hour?

All?? We servicing you alone only issit?? Don't send now you will die issit?



Purple's phone rings

Ms Irrinoying: Purps ah, I just sent you an email. You received or not?

Purples: Nope. Not yet.

Ms Irrinoying: Hmmm....I sent about 10 mins ago leh. I send again.

Purples: ok.

2 minutes later....

Ms Irrinoying: Eh Purps, have you received the email?

Purples: Nope.

Ms Irrinoying: Funny. Is there something wrong with your email?

Purples: Dunno. But I have no problems receiving other external mails.

This went on for awhile till the email finally came in. I ended up with 4 emails from her. Each 4MB in size. And she wonders why it took so long. Sheesh. And how well do you know me har, to call me by a short form??



Cooking Girl's phone rings.

Ms Irrinoying: Cooking Girl, can you give me the availability of all these places for the whole year?

Cooking Girl: ALL these places for the WHOLE year? Don't you have a brief which has more in-depth details?

Ms Irrinoying: Erm, ya, but I need to provide client with options.

I say again, client ask you to eat shit you eat ah?

Cooking Girl: Mmm. Ok.

Ms Irrinoying: Can send now?

Cooking Girl: You've to give me some time to check since you want ALL the sites for the WHOLE year.

2 minutes later, the phone rings.....

Ms Irrinoying: Cooking girl ah, what is the cost of this ah? And that leh?

Cooking Girl: I thought I've given it to you before? Anyway, it's all in the rate book.

Ms Irrinoying: I know I know. But I'm waiting for your email so that I can send it out to client.

Cooking Girl: Ok. I'm in the midst of the email now.

1 minute later, the phone rings again.

Ms Irrinoying: Eh Cooking Girl, I checked. Cannot find in the rate book leh!

Cooking Girl: Then can you gimme 5 mins to get the email out???

This is the same girl who leaves a missed call on our mobiles. A minute later, we get another missed call from her. And then another and another in the next few minutes until our phones display 10 missed calls in a span of 15 minutes!!! Somebody tell me just what she is thinking??? How come people like this exist?

Well anyway, she really irritated the hell outta Cooking Girl today. After repeated ringing of her phone, I heard the volume of her voice gradually increasing, and then this....

Haha. It was damn funny. But for all her laziness and stupidity and no-use of her brain, Ms Irrinoying deserves all the shit and sarcasm we throw her. I could give you more examples, but I shan't waste my time.

Laziness, I Cannot Tahan!

Inexperience, I can understand.

Slow learner, I can teach.

New to the job, I can excuse.

Carelessness, I can accept. Sometimes.

Laziness, I CANNOT tahan.

In my line of work, I have to

- keep my cool even though I'm on the brink of losing it

- smile when that someone really deserves a frown

- make small talk, when in actual fact, a real telling-off is what that person needs

I've been really pissed off at work recently, and I've not put into practise any of the above. Especially when it comes to a certain, particular someone. So if you've been getting nothing but sarcasm from me this week and last, it's simply because: LAZINESS, I CANNOT TAHAN!

Fishmongering

In the course of work, we come across some nice people, some not-so-nice people, some extra-careful-till-it-irritates you kind of people, the call-you-a-dozen-times-in-twelve-minutes kind of people, and the list goes on. In my line of work, one of the worst kinds of people you can encounter must be the bargaining fishmongers. And most of the time, they are the in-betweens, if you know what I mean. And then you get conversations like these... ...

(An excerpt from Digital Curls' conversation with the Fishmonger)

Fishmonger: How much this one?

Digital Curls: $5,000

Fishmonger: Aiyah. That one is standard one la. Can gimme better or not?

Digital Curls: This is really the best deal already.

Fishmonger: Then for the other one, what is the best you can gimme?

Digital Curls: We can work on a 40% bonus.

Fishmonger: Har? That one everybody also get one what! Cheaper la!

Digital Curls: That is really an extremely good package already.

(Now, the Fishmonger decides to switch to a mix of dialect and Mandarin.)

Fishmonger: Aiyah! Zui hao shi ta men bu yao gen ni mai. Zhe me "ngiao ji" (Translation: Aiyah! The best is they don't buy from you. So stingy)

Digital Curls: *speechless*

Frankly, I think Digital Curls would have loved to rebutt back, but in all professionalism, and in her efforts not to degrade herself to the Fishmonger's level, she keeps mum.

My thoughts were proven right in an SMS exchange with her later that evening.

Purples: Enjoy your dinner Ms Ngiao Ji!

Digital Curls: Ha! Don't be na beh!

All Work And No Play Makes Jack A Dull Boy

I'm sure you've heard that idiom before. And I SO live by it. I mean, work, at the end of the day, is just work. Work can never be finished. Ever. Besides, there's a whole lot more to life than just work, isn't there?

But sometimes, you need more than just work and play. You need to kill, you know. Just like today. I feel like killing people.

Tell me, what about people pisses you off most?

a) People who do a half-fark job

b) People with double farking standards

c) People with no farking sense of urgency or priority

d) People who love taking credit but equally farking love to shirk responsibility and accountability

Ans: _________


Now tell me, what about organisations pisses you off more?

a) Orgs that have messy, unsystematic work processes

b) Orgs that recognise and reward highly unworthy people

Ans: ________


If you had an answer that resembles the first 4 letters of the alphabet, I guess you're lucky to be working where you are. You'd better not leave. You might just jump out of the frying pan and into the fire if you do. I look at option (a) and I go "Ya this is the worst." Then I see option (b) and I go "Ya this is the worst." Then I look at option (c) and......you get the drift? How could you have managed to pick just one???

Ok. I've spewed enough profanities and mentally killed enough people for the day. I'm gonna say my bedtime prayers, ask for forgiveness and go to bed.

Maybe tomorrow, I spew and kill again. Or maybe the night's rest would have calmed the profane murderer in me.

Dessert Retreat

It's a Monday. I wasn't at work. I wasn't at the usual Monday morning meeting. Neither was I on leave. I spent the day at Changi Village Hotel!!!

Actually, the whole department did.

We were having a department retreat. The usual ritual companies invest in to foster team-building, synergy, cooperation and camaraderie amongst fellow colleagues. So we played games like "Bull in the Pit" and "Circle of Trust" and "Flying Saucer" and "Octopus Game". We even had one that had us role play squirrels and trees to bring across the idea of role-change and adaptation in the work environment. Somehow it reminded me of that "In and out the cherry window" game I used to play in kindergarten and primary school.

Then, of course, we had the mandatory "What's next year's target?", "What and where are the opportunities for growth and development?" presentations and discussions. Bleah.

The best part of the retreat though, was the dessert at lunch. Bread pudding (my favourite!), fruit platter (normal but healthy), chocolate mousse (yummy), blueberry mousse (yummier), fruit cake (so-so), tiramisu (ok), some nonya kuehs (didn't try) and chocolate ice-cream (normal. What brand ice cream huh?).



There was also fruit cocktail that was served in champagne flutes. Very pretty but not very yummy.

Turn Off, Turn On

The copier at office recently has an added function which is really cool. It can scan documents AND send it to staff via email within the minute.

So I was waiting in line to get some documents scanned. Cooking Girl was taking a while as she was having problems with copying. Something about paper size. Think she got a bit stressed as Digital Curls and I were waiting to learn how to work that scan function from another colleague. So, there were 3 of us there, all waiting for her to be done with her copying.

And that's when I learnt a really quick way of solving the problem when the copier doesn't register the right paper size. Turn the whole machine off and then turn it on again.

Actually, I think it works for troubleshooting all other problems, not just with paper size.

Thanks for the tip, Cooking Girl! :p