An Unfamiliar Quiet

I woke up this morning to the unfamiliar sound of total quietness. There was no shuffling of feet, no teaspoon stirring against the coffee cup, no gush of water from the toilet tap from the room just next to mine and no one asking me if I was going to be back for dinner just before I left for work. There was no one for me to argue with over how she handled the dog, and no one for me to tell off for leaving taps and switches on.

In fact, the days have been like this since 12 July, when Mama, my paternal grandmother passed away on 11 July. It hit me how much I had taken these simple things for granted. And it dawned on me that I should always remember to be a little nicer to people dear to me. Less impatient, more understanding, more tolerant, more loving. But human as we are, apart from the "what-if" questions we will never have answers to, we also tend to live with the "If-only-I-had......" statements. Honestly, we should all live like today's the last - live life doing things that would not render us living in the "if-only-I-had..." mode.

Nonetheless, my Mama had lived a long and meaningful 84 years. The most beautiful gift she left us must be our extremely close-knit extended family, comprising 7 of her children, 10 grandchildren and 4 great grandchildren.

Mama's tone of voice and actions sometimes leave you annoyed, frustrated and wanting to argue back (which I did, many a time), but deep down in her heart, there was always love and good intention. And vice versa, the way we sometimes spoke to her. This, I saw in my own relationship with her, as well as in the one she had with my father.

My only regret is that she did not stay long enough with us to be at Kayestercan's and my wedding, which I know she was so looking forward to. But I know she will be there with us in spirit.

Mama, till we meet again, know that you were truly loved by all of us and will continue to be in our hearts, thoughts and prayers.